Part II of II.
At thirty years old, I found myself single and facing a dating pool that generally did not complement my traditionalism. But instead of caving to cultural norms, the Holy Spirit gave me the courage to be honest with my would-be suitors. I told them what I was looking for and not surprisingly, most of them were not interested. My now-husband, however, was different. He didn’t balk at my value system and once our daughter was born, I no longer taught kindergarten and transitioned to full-time motherhood and homemaking.
I couldn’t be happier with the way my Important Career turned out; how fortunate am I that I can watch my babies grow and nurture my family full-time? It’s better than my wildest dreams. I no longer worry how I am going to shoulder my financial burdens alone, and for that I am so grateful to the Lord and to my husband. Call me crazy but I actually feel a deep-seated pleasure when I see how much my husband enjoys the hot dinner I made him after running himself ragged all day. If I ever feel guilty or the feminist mantras (“you’ve got to pull your own weight!”) come creeping back, I remember that feeling when my husband is snappy from stress and I have the choice to bite my tongue.
My heart goes out to any mother who is forced to make the choice to provide for her family, because she is to be distinguished. To not appreciate the gift that I have been given—to whine that I feel unfulfilled or unable to “pursue my passions”—is to detract from the real sacrifices these women make.
But my journey doesn’t end here. I receive many comments and not-so-gracious questions regarding the choice to stay at home with my daughter. “How old is your baby?” is invariably followed with, “When does your maternity leave end?” I find myself at a loss to respond in a way that isn’t incredibly awkward for both parties. Going against the grain is never easy, and I’m still learning how to navigate a culture that opposes my family’s structure.
If you are a “stay-at-home-mom,” how do you respond to our current cultural climate and general attitudes toward motherhood?